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The large black metal gates loomed up as I cycled along an English country side road, the long drive was the first view I had entering the monastery. As soon as I passed the gates I had this visceral feeling I belong here. Fifteen years still later still a monk I had the same feeling alone in the Australian outback this time it came with the clarity of stop being a monk: I don’t belong here anymore.

Where do you belong?
To your family
Your peers
Your Organization
Your Body

What keeps you fitting in?
Social pressure?
Cultures norms?
Family values?
Beliefs ?
Comparison?
Social Media?

I’ve been reflecting on the word belonging and whilst brushing my teeth last night the thought came if you remove the word longing from belonging, you have the word be: to be rather than to do.

I found if we can understand why we long for something, why we try to fit into what we know isn’t working for us, it gives is space to recognise and connected to where we need to be: this freedom of thought I call beingness. In a strange way belonging requires an utter aloneness, which allows us to be connected to everything.

I had this sense of belonging when I took the photo in the slide deck last night: I was part of something bigger than me, Brene Brown a researcher on this topic says we are wired for this.

What do you think helps belonging in the workplace and in our society?

#executivecoaching #leadershipdevelopment #happinessatwork

Find the linkedin post here